


High Collars and Low Expectations

by EvilMuffins



Category: Fire Emblem Series, Fire Emblem: If | Fire Emblem: Fates
Genre: Banter, F/M, Formalwear, Innuendo
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-17
Updated: 2016-05-17
Packaged: 2018-06-08 22:56:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 690
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6878203
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EvilMuffins/pseuds/EvilMuffins
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>“Oh please, Niles. It’s a little too early in the evening for asking a lady to be ‘stuffing’ things places, isn’t it?”<br/>---<br/>Charlotte wears a new dress. Some people are more pleased than others.</p>
            </blockquote>





	High Collars and Low Expectations

**Author's Note:**

> These two wound up being my OTP for this game. I'm sorry to anyone who expected better of me.
> 
> Takes place sometime during their supports, but before they marry.

“Oh, hello there, Niles! Lovely evening we’re having, isn’t it?”

If she had been writing on parchment, all of the ‘i’s would have been dotted with hearts, Niles thought.

“Stuff it,” he said, gulping down the drink Jakob had handed to him moments ago, making his rounds with a tray full of goblets. “Why are you wearing that thing?”

Niles gestured toward all of Charlotte’s person with his free hand.

“Oh please, Niles. It’s a little too early in the evening for asking a lady to be ‘stuffing’ things places, isn’t it?” the border guard retorted.

 _Damnit. I didn’t even catch that one. She’s good._ Niles smirked. Maybe this party wasn’t going to be so boring after all.

“If you must know,” she continued, glancing around the room before dropping her façade with a ‘tsk’ing sound, “That brat Lady Elise forced me to wear it. She said I’d look _‘pretty’_ , but none of the men want anything to do with me now! They’re all flocking to Lady Camilla instead. I haven’t even been offered a drink yet, yet normally, I could have floated away by now!”

Niles looked to where Camilla stood in the opposite corner of the ballroom, surrounded by a gaggle of soldiers and foreign nobles, male and female alike, the majority seemingly quite taken with her newest gown. It was a good thing for the throng of bodies pressing in against her, Niles thought, otherwise the particular cut of her dress might would likely cause her to become just a tad chilly in the airy hall.

He turned his attention back to where Charlotte stood pouting beside him, stiff dress collar tall enough to graze her chin, dark velvet enrobing her completely, like the fudge fondant covering the cake waiting to be served.

“I don’t know… You leave more to imagination this way. It’s a tease. Those guys over there, they just gobble up the first thing they see. They don’t understand that most things are better when you wait for them, draw things out, savor the build-up and all that crap.”

“Well, aren’t you the philosopher.” Charlotte rolled her eyes. “You certainly are persistent when it comes to me.”

“Now see that? It was worth the wait.” Niles raised an eyebrow, practically grinning now. “What other guys here tonight get the pleasure of seeing you lay yourself bare? Let them have their fun, and we’ll have ours.”

“I can assure you that as long as an ass like you is breathing the same air as me, I’m not having any ‘fun’. You’re probably the real reason no one’s giving a shit about me tonight. It’s not the dress at all- I could still give any healthy man a heart attack, even in a dress that looks like my granny’s sofa.”

Niles looked out toward the shiny polished floor once again, before turning back to Charlotte, hand outstretched in an exaggerated gesture. “Would you care to dance? Maybe it’ll make everyone insanely jealous that even an ‘ass’ like me gets to dance with the oh so lovely darling of the border guards, no matter what she's wearing.”

Charlotte made a face as if she was either- a) Going to push him into the punchbowl, or b) Barf up the punch she had never been served. It was hard to tell for certain, even for someone who prided themselves on reading people.

“You can’t be serious.”

Niles snorted. “I wasn’t. You wanna go ditch these fine gentleman, and wander over to the kitchens? We can wait outside and make Felicia nervous. I scared her so bad the other day, she soiled her-“

Charlotte held up a hand. “I’ll come with you as long as you don’t finish that story.”

Niles placed a hand on the small of Charlotte’s back guiding her out of the room, into the crisp night air. “Number one- she spilled soup, splashing her apron. I don’t know what _you_ thought with that lady-like mind of your’s. Number two- You said it yourself before, the evening is still far two young for ‘ _coming_ with me’, especially in the kitchens of all places. How unsanitary!”

 

_End_

**Author's Note:**

> I've never attempted so much innuendo before. rip me
> 
> If you enjoyed this and are planning to bookmark, please considering hitting 'kudos' as well! Ao3 doesn't notify me of bookmarks, so I won't know that you enjoyed it without kudos! :)


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